Lately, it seems that everything is getting piled on. Right now is either a test, or a giant, hectic mess. I feel like it's the latter, but I'd like to stay optimistic that it's just a test. A test because I've been selling myself short lately, and I know I can handle things if I look at them the right way. There have been nights these past few weeks where I prefer not to fall asleep, and mornings when I wake up before it's light out and wonder why I can't sleep past dawn anymore. Tonight, I looked through a bunch of old pictures and saw how much fun I was having- at the beginning of the schoolyear, or even a few weeks ago. I've managed to allow myself to get so consumed with things that are bringing me down, that I overlook the simple things. I forget to eat because I worry about things I have no control over. I worry myself to sleep and wake up exhausted. I feel like I have such a large part of my life missing, and I can't seem to find it. I know that it's not just because certain things having ended that I feel this way, it's something more than that.
I need to find it.
No comments:
Post a Comment