transitions

It's funny how I can go from having one of the best weekends ever to feeling so, so low. Really, it's quite simple. All it takes is me driving far away from about 60% of the things that hold relevance and meaning to me (The other 40%- my family, the tcd, my bed at home, and the dv-r- are still important, however). I drive away from the place I've lived the past nine amazing months at, my close friends, and familiarity for utter boredom back home- so surprisingly, I'm not too happy. Mix in about all of Illinois' licensed drivers who have no idea that the left lane is for passing and not driving in tandem next to the slow moving farm equipment in the right lane. Factor in the fact that when I got home, all I could focus on was how my throat was killing me and I was exhausted. I could barely leave out enough details when I recapped my weekend with my mom so that she would not know I spent 3am on Saturday night chugging Lunch Boxes and rolling around in the backseat of a cab. Exhausting. And then, I found myself in bed, unable to fall asleep, not so different from the past two weeks. There's something about laying next to someone you care about and not sleeping because you're busy talking in comparison to laying in your bed by yourself, restless. And amazingly, I somehow managed to drag myself over to the pool to dip myself in chlorine with ninos for two hours. I ran like hell out of there to bake myself in the sun for the remaining hours of my day and even that felt like un-quality time. The rest of the afternoon was unproductive up until Derrik and I spent a good two hours on the phone plotting our lives in general. I cried at some point, laughed my ass off, and knee drove my way to work. Within an hour of working at Forever, my feet and shoulders started hurting while I dragged around a cart of run-backs. I realized that retail customers are possibly the rudest people in the world, and I couldn't understand why after someone tried clothes on, they would possibly see it fitting to ball the garment up in the corner of the fitting room rather than just fucking hanging it on the hanger. A whole hour and a half after Gurnee Mills closed its doors to all of the quality customers who shop there, Forever 21 was finally restored back to its original splendor- a somewhat disorganized chaos. One would think that when a mall parking lot is empty, it would be easy to remember where you parked, but this is not the case. After finding my car and subjecting myself to listen to downer music to continue my mood of being pissed off, I made my way home to where I am right now: cranky and not looking forward to my life this week. The most important thing I learned today is that I need to start creating occasions for all of the clothes I buy, and that I will never live in Round Lake for a long period of time again. That is fucking all.